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Murphy's Law strikes again. But, as lj just deleted the post for the second time, I am going to impale myself on my endpin.

The short version? (Prays to the lj gods.)

Three photo classes left in which to do three weeks worth of work.

Developed a wonderful red rash on my face just in time for the concert.

Fucked up majorly in front of the top three cellists in the northern half of the state. One of whom was "sitting in" as my stand partner. He is also the principle cellist of the Philharmonic. I did not know he was "sitting in", and therefore was rather surprised when he sat down next to me. The other two were the university's cello teacher and my private teacher from high school, both of whom are also in the Philharmonic.

Stick a fork in me; I was done before I ever played a note.

I normally have moderate to severe performance anxiety. Normally. Tonight was about as severe as it gets. My hands were shaking so hard I could barely hold my bow. And I literally COULD NOT count past four. Or remember tenor clef, or key sig, or...

And no, I am not exaggerating. It really was the worst I have ever played. Ever.

Really, tonight was probably the worst thing musically that has happened since I started playing. Hands down.

Am going home to sleep now. Perhaps this will all have been nothing more than a nightmare. Because, really, I could not have screwed up more if I had walked onto stage naked.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 3rd, 2005 05:01 am (UTC)
*Hugs* Feel better! Actually, I'm going to call you now...
May. 3rd, 2005 03:52 pm (UTC)
Hmmm...you aren't perchance taking amoxicilin, are you? Cause I got pretty rashy last week, too, and that was the only thing I could attribute it too, although I've never reacted to it that way before.

Well, now you know the worst you can do at a concert. From here on up, it can only get better. ;) Don't feel too bad...I had one concert in which I started the piece playing one song and finished playing a completely different song, which was not on the program for me to play. Strangely enough, my friend Brandy did the same thing in the same concert. And yes, this was the command performance for the Nevada Pianist Guild, and everyone who was anyone in piano in the area was there.
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )



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